Sea of Love....

anthropomorphic fantasies.......

I read with great sadness that a dolphin commited suicide because he couldn't bear being in captivity..the NewsPRess told me this in an editorial..and the guy who told them was a former trainer for the Flipper TV show...the dolphin apparently had enough and one night he snuck out of his pen, went into his trainer's bedroom, took out a gun from the nightstand, held it to his head, pulled trigger and blew his dolphin brains out all over the satin sheets! What a mess....at least that's what they said..keep in mind that dolphins have 12 inch wangs and can shoot about 14 feet! 14 feet!! Why would he commit suicide with so much to live for??
Now, all this came about when WendyandorTravis was preaching about the proper use of the internet, ie, looking out for animal abuse as opposed to, say, pointing out all the lies and bullshit the News-Press has printed for the last eight years...so ok from now on, I'll use the internet to help out Wendy and alert you all to animal crimes...
here's the first one:
Swimmer Escapes Rape by Dolphin who seems to be a swinger
OSLO, Aug 17, 1999 (AFP) - A dolphin tried to rape a 28-year-old Norwegian swimmer who had been gambolling with it off the south coast of Norway, the newspaper Verdens Gang reported Tuesday.The animal, which had been circling around the swimmer, suddenly stuck its penis between his leg and his bathing costume before the man managed to free himself and escape back aboard his nearby boat."At first I thought it was pushing me with its flipper but dolphins don't have flippers beneath their bellies," the unidentified swimmer explained.Another swimmer who witnessed the scene from the boat told the newspaper he had to ward off similar advances from the dolphin a few minutes earlier."He tried his luck with me but I was protected by my waterproof suit," that swimmer said.
"I've had just about enough of their rapin' shenanigans. The rest of you may be content with a "don't ask, don't tell" policy regarding dolphin sex, but I won't stand for it anymore. I refuse to sit back and let the dolphin enablers preach to me about their gentle nature, or complain about how the poor, innocent dolphins are being trapped and killed in tuna nets. I don't even like tuna, but if the tuna industry is in any way responsible for wiping out those opprobrious dolphin rapists, I may have to reconsider my dietary choices."
now..do animals commit suicide??
No. Animals do not commit suicide as such. In order for an act to be classed as "suicide," the agent must know that what it is about to do will end its life. In order to have this awareness, the agent must also understand that it could exist in one of two possible states: alive or dead. These sorts of thoughts are far too abstract for any known animal to think, even the more intelligent non-humans like Chimpanzees, Bonobos, and Dolphins.
there..the proper use of the internet....