maybe I was dreaming, but somehow I snagged an invitation to Thanksgiving dinner at an exclusive country club in Montecito! It's called Birnam Wood and if you're rich and white you
may get to be a member..or you can just be a guest of a member and reap all the benefits of the true golf club experience..now I'm no golfer but I do like the LPGA tour with faves like Paula Creamer(!), Michelle (can't say no) Wie who has the best legs in golf, and Lorena Ochoa, a Mexican cutie..golf, you see, is a woman's game, not a man's game..the guys just look silly playing it..like a bunch of flakes! so anyway..what's become of Montecito lately..such a focus on wealth or looking wealthy...the women are botoxed and collagened so they look like demons! 
All signs of age that nature intends have been hidden behind a plastic smile and daddy's money will let you continue the delusion..it's a very sick place..it didn't used to be that way..a very casual little beach town has turned into a gated- ungated community of effeminate men like Ty Warner and Randall Van Wolfswinkel...and there's nothing I can do about it..or is there?So anyway.... I want to check out why Birnam Wood hosted a breakfast tribute to Dr. Laura a few weeks back and I certainly hope Laura will be close to our table on Thanksgiving Day..I don't think she's a member, but whoever invited her once may do it again...did she dump her motorcycle to take up golf? I don't kanow.. but this area of Montecito and Buena Vista Drive has been home to many great celebrities, folks who deserve their status and place in Hollywood lore...folks like Burl Ives, Joe Walsh, Paul Williams..folks with real talent unlike Dr. Laura who is a LEECH!! Yes, I'll find out what's going on and report back, with pictures of opulence you won't believe!! and maybe get the LPGA tour to stop here!
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